Happy New Year

 Don't drink and drive.  You might die and never get  to see my boobies again."

Amber Reveals Favorite Position

I only believe in marriage for tax purposes.  And I really need to get married before the 31st for the write-off.

My favorite position is "manager" or maybe "owner".

Hi, Mom

[ While on the phone with her mother. ]


"Yeah, mom.  Bring the weed."
"Gotta go mom.  A few hundred guys want to bang me."

Previously on JustAmber

My dad wishes he had a vagina.

So, mom and I were leaving the porn shop when...

[ squabbling with neighbor ]

"Why is that bitch stomping on my ceiling?"

"she shook my hand but little did she know it had been in my vagina"